Ep. 31 - Baby, If You Ever Wondered

April 2, 2016

Writer: Bill Dial

Director: Rod Daniel

Original Air Date: December 3, 1979
***VERY IMPORTANT***

I have been waiting for this episode to rant about one of my long held theories concerning "WKRP in Cincinnati." Here it is: Andy Travis is not very good at his job!

He doesn't program the music; he let's the DJs program their own stuff even though by this point in American radio, nobody followed that practice. He doesn't help Herb generate leads or close sales; when he wants more money for the station, Andy sends Carlson off to see his mother. He doesn't advise Les on what direction the news reports should take. Mostly what he does is roll his eyes and complain when things don't go the way he wants them to.

It always amazed me that Andy doesn't take advantage of any of the situations that have been presented to him, the way a seasoned radio professional who has travelled "up and down the dial" ought to.

Let's go through the list of complaints Andy shares with Venus: 1) what radio station relies on one sales person? Years ago, I worked for my university radio station (ie community, back funded) and they had THREE sales people, plus the station manager. If you don't like what Herb is doing, hire someone else to work with him. 2) nobody is listening to a rock radio station for its hard hitting journalism, but they would definitely listen to someone who says things like "Chai Chai Rod-ra-queeze." Why WKRP doesn't have billboards up touting "More Rock and Les Nessman" is beyond me. 3) If Jennifer is the highest paid employee at the station, then get her to do more. Have JENNIFER generate sales leads for Herb. We seen men throw money at her just for looking at them 4) You're a rock station! You WANT your DJ's saying on they air that they would rather throw themselves in front of Donna Summers tour bus than play disco music. Andy would know that if he PROGRAMMED THE MUSIC!!!

Clean Up! Bailey's coming in!

Andy is absolutely right - everything worthwhile he accomplished at WKRP he did within his first week. The rest of the time, he just seems to stroke egos. Les believes if his ratings are bad in Cincinnati, his "next stop" will be the Washington Post? Herb believes he deserves a new car with "rich Corenthian leather." Mr. Carlson wants to build a new station !?!? Who has spent a year convincing everyone that this is where he is leading them? Andy Travis. What has he done to get them there? Nothing but made friends with them.

Okay. My rant about Andy is done. Now I'm going to rant about Venus' lecture at the end of the episode.

"You can't fire the little guys if you can't fire the Big Guy." What does that mean?? Carlson is Andy's boss - Andy can't fire him. Carlson's mother clearly knows what kind of station manager he is and has never fired him. She's not going to do it on Andy's word. Carlson would happily let Andy be the heavy and fire Herb or Les or Johnny. I don't know where you work, but anywhere I've worked, employees don't fire their bosses - especially in a family owed company.

Venus' advise breaks down into "Don't worry about not being perfect at your job anymore. Now you're a screw up like the rest of the people who work here... except for me." That's not really inspirational.

It's impossible not to watch this episode about radio ratings and not believe it reflects the thoughts of the cast and crew towards their own CBS ratings issues. On one hand, everyone is obviously nervous about the ratings, while some still put up the front of ratings no mattering. Johnny says he doesn't care about the ratings before swigging from a coffee carafe. Bailey says there is too much emphasis on ratings but hasn't had the experience Herb has of trying to sell a station with poor ratings. I can easily imagine young, creative writers in the WKRP writers room fighting for artistic quality being more important than ratings while producers and network executives complain about selling ads on "WKRP" when its ratings are poor.

Herb and Johnny are closer than we think

This episode revolves around each characters reactions to the ratings. I found it interesting how similarly the characters worried about what the numbers meant for them instead of remaining in their "dungarees vs suits" camps. Both Herb and Johnny press their ears up to Mr. Carlson's door for a hint of what the book reveals. (In real life, Hesseman is only two years older than Bonner, whereas we tend to consider Herb significantly older). Both Les and Venus exclaim loudly at their positive ratings when we don't see them reacting similarly to many other things.

This episode also revolves around one of the great equations in life: happiness equals reality divided by expectations. (Feel free to use that in an inspirational poster in your office). The same reality that makes Andy trash his office has Carlson popping his champagne cork!

Roy

Other notes: For decades, the Arbitron company was the ratings book of record in American radio, until purchased by Neilson in 2013. We see the widest shots of the set that we will ever see on the show, from the long panning shot of the lobby after the theme song to the edge Carlson's office when he clicks his heels. Remember when Andy introduced the idea of changing the format by unfurling a KISS poster behind his desk? Now, it's a Chuck Mangione poster.  Regular producer Rod Daniel directed this episode and must have wanted to show where all the set money has gone. (Extra Note: a couple of weeks after this posting, Rod Daniel passed away at age 73. My condolences to his loved ones)