Ep. 88 - Up and Down the Dial

December 25, 2020

Writer: Dan Guntzelman
Director: George Gaynes
Original Air Date: April 21, 1982

**VERY IMPORTANT**

I propose that in television the difference between a "finale" and a "final episode" is forewarning. When the creators of a show know this is its last season and last episode, they can build to it, wrap up all the loose ends and say a tear-filled goodbye to the audience.  M*A*S*H, Cheers, Newhart and Seinfeld all had finales. Even WKRP's mother show "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" had a famous finale that shows up every year on "Best Finales Ever" lists. But other beloved shows like The Jeffersons or Taxi just ended because the writers and producers didn't have the forewarning. They didn't know it was the end.

"WKRP in Cincinnati" is in a somewhat different position. The producers and writers "kinda" knew this was the end. There were strong indications the show was about to be cancelled, but not enough to promote it as a "finale." So now I make another proposal: "Up and Down the Dial" should be considered a finale, and moreover, should be considered as great of a finale as any of those above mentioned classics. If not a finale, then perhaps as the greatest final episode of all time!

Throughout 88+ blog entries, I have tried to steer clear from ever proclaiming this show, or any of it's episodes as the greatest anything. There are certainly classics and I have my own favourites, but I make this point now because I don't know of any other final episode which is used to explain why the show exists. This episode doesn't answer questions like "Will Bailey and Johnny get together" or "Does Les ever get walls." It answers this question: Why does a station like WKRP even exist?

Everybody who works there knows it's screwed up. They know there should be more than one salesman (even the smallest stations have two or three)! They know Les is incompetent - not just poor at his job but dangerously unqualified for anything beyond farm reports. They know the format is all over the place - there is no station in America on which Johnny's music and Venus' music is both played, and neither of those is "a Top 40 Rocker" like Andy claims. They know the General Manager is asleep or playing with toys. Once you get over the comedy of all of this, a reasonable person should ask, why would Mama Carlson allow this to happen?

In this final episode, we get the answer. It's so simple it is elegant. The answer is delivered beautifully, with stakes on the line. The episode ends with the characters in a place they should all be in. Even the title of the episode feels like the end.

"WKRP in Cincinnati" did get the finale it deserved. We just didn't realize it at the time.

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As it opens, Andy calls a meeting in his office because the new ratings book has come out. At first he pretends to be angry saying there are going to be some changes around here. That's called foreshadowing, kids.  Notice nobody is surprised that the ratings might be bad. Herb says "he could feel it on the streets for weeks now." Instead they should all be shocked the ratings might be bad. But Andy was kidding!  He's thrilled the station has risen to sixth in the market. Johnny's #1 overall. Venus is #3 overall and #1 with women 18-35 (of course he is). After four years, the station is finally making some money. 

Andy keeps putting Les off when he asks how the news ratings are until Andy finally conceeds that news "never does that good on a Top 40 Rocker. " That raises a lot of points: so this is already not a destination station for anybody wanting the news. That will come up later. Also, if that's the case, why does Andy care whether Les does rutabaga stories or not? The audience isn't tuning in for the news anyhow. Or is it that the ratings could be even higher if news, and mostly Les, wasn't dragging them down?

But this is WKRP and good news can never last for long. Jennifer comes in and tells Andy there is a man in the lobby claiming to be the new News Director.

Charles von Sanker looks like a man who would expect his office to have walls. Andy is convinced by his story of being hired over the phone by Mrs. Carlson that he is a legitimate hire because that's the way he was originally hired. Mr. von Sanker is a well-spoken family man from Fargo ND who would have jumped at the chance to get to market like Cincinnati and sounds reasonable enough to know what a actual news story is. Also, he is heavily sucking up to Mama Carlson even when she isn't there. I'm sure that's something that she would like after four years of Andy Travis.

Les is paranoid his bad ratings mean he's going to be fired and that's also what Andy thinks as he tears out of the station to confront Mrs. Carlson and fight for Les' job.

By some bizarro logic, Herb thinks that the station being more popular means he can do even less work. "The phone's gonna ring off the wall!" he says. He wants to pal around in the DJ booth (which of course he sees as fun and not real work) to the irritation of Johnny and Venus. When asked why he's there Herb advises "Enjoy this John. It sure as hell can't last." (Is that character to character or actor to actor? Given the real life situation, it's pretty profound). In the funniest sight gag of the episode, the DJ's silently roll Herb out into the hall.

Symbolism alert: When Andy gets to the Carlson mansion, Hirsch is sharpening a knife. Cuts are coming!

Mrs. Carlson intended to discuss Mr. von Sanker with Andy next week, but he demands answers now. He asks if she has three solid reasons why Les should be fired "Yes, he's incompetent, unprofessional and very weird." It didn't take her even a second to rhyme those reasons off.

But she then pulls out a 660 pages report she has had prepared by one of the top radio consultant firms in the country, all about the Cincinnati market and WKRP's place in it. It concludes: "WKRP's Top 40 audience is at its peak. The sound quality of the AM signal can not compete with FM stations. If WKRP is to remain profitable in the long run, we recommend changing to a non-music format: All News."

Von Sanker wasn't hired to replace Les. He was hired to replace Andy. 

Andy is in shock and angry! they are finally making some money at the station and she wants to throw away all of that hard work, mostly HIS hard work to move to a format he knows nothing about. She asks "Are you through?" and Andy replies "Well you tell me." Next shot is him cleaning out his office.

Everyone comes back in from the party celebrating the good ratings, tipsy and thrilled. Even Les has a little glow about him. When Andy delivers the news of the format change, they all think he's pranking them again, like he did at the beginning of the day. Once the news settles in, Herb delivers what might be his most Herb-defining line: "Wait, wait wait a minute. How does this effect me?"

Some time has passed and Johnny, Venus and Andy are commisserating drunkenly in the booth when Mr Carlson comes in. He's been talking to his mother about the changes for the station. He believes his mother is doing what's best for the station. "She wants us to be #1!" Andy can stay on as public relations director. Venus would become traffic reporter. Arthur talks about how being number one is the American Way, but each example he gives is wrong. Johnny asks "Were you this effective with your Mother?" and it gets a big laugh. 

Arthur says "I'm just trying to make a point" to which Johnny replies: "So am I." He leaves the booth with no further explanation. It seems like a joke, but as we've learned about Johnny, he's faster when he's drunk. 

I'm so happy that Hirsch made one final appearance in WKRP! This is one of his best! Greeting Johnny at the door, he assumes it's a homeless man coming to beg for money. But when he learns this is Johnny Fever, his manner changes dramatically. "You're the DJ who has caused her so much discomfort over the years. Please make yourself comfortable!"

What follows is the single most important conversation in the history of the show. That is not an overstatement. It is between two characters at the farthest spectrum from each other, economically, socially and politically. One is the boss, the other the employee. But where do they connect? They are both survivors. Both are willing to go to extremes for what they believe in. And most importantly, and oddly, they both actually care about Arthur Carlson.  Somehow all of that seems appropriate for the final episode that explains why WKRP is the way it is and has been for years

Johnny doesn't come in with much of an argument other than to say that this decision is going to hurt the existing staff. "Probably the farthest things from your mind was the people who work for you."

Mrs. Carlson says everybody gets to keep a job with the new format "If you're an announcer, you can announce." She says this in a way that makes her seem charitable. "I didn't have to do that." But Johnny sees through that, pointing out if she wants the new format to work, people like Venus, Andy and himself are all gone. He's trying to explain that if the profit is all that counts, what she will have to do is... But she firmly cuts him off.

"The profit is NOT all that counts!"

Johnny is confused but Mrs. Carlson explains: "Profit and loss are merely theoretical terms in a diversified conglomerate like Carlson Industries. It's not the plus and minus, Mr. Fever. It's the plus and plus IF the minuses are played correctly."

And Johnny finally gets it! It's a way for thinking the dungaries crowd just doesn't do and suits in the station would be too stupid to think of. But Johnny is older, has seen more in life and is certainly not stupid. "This is so deeply warped even I get it."

" 'KRP is not suppose to make money! That's the deal! We're set up to lose. But we didn't. And that's why your changing the format! So you can lose money for two more years."

We can see Johnny mind spinning at the news. She has said several times through the years that she doesn't trust her son to ever do the right thing. Why give him a job like General Manager? Why keep a nitwit like Les on the air? No radio station of WKRP's size, in a market the size of Cincinnati would have one salesman. There should be four or five, on top of a General Manager who would be in charge or maintaining relationships with the existing clients. Why only keep one, especially when that one is a lazy con man like Herb? The receptionist should not be the highest paid employee. Why hire a washed up old hippie as a drive time DJ? Finally FINALLY it all makes sense.

Except for the lying.

"You're telling your own son that you want him to be the General Manager of the number one station in the market, and you'd be happier if it were sixteenth.

How do you think he'd feel if he knew?"

I don't think that notion had ever occurred to her before. All Arthur has ever wanted to do is make his mother happy and the thing that makes her happiest is his continued failure. "How do you think he'd feel if he knew?

It has not been a funny conversation, so Hirsch, breaking the fourth wall for the first time ever on the show is a relief. "An very interesting turn, don't you think?"

Arthur comes to the door. Andy and Venus follow, staggeringly drunk. He brought them so Mama could explain to them, the way she had to him, why this format change will be good for everyone. Johnny is playing Chicken with her. He has nothing to loose. Everything he cares about is going to be taken away if she doesn't change her mind, so he barrels forward in telling Arthur what he's learned. The whole time, he's keeping his eye on Mama.

"Oh was our conversation confidential?"

Finally she relents. She tells Arthur to keep the format as it is. Johnny is very proud "Ah! A Mother's Love!"

The final scene of the series takes place the next morning in Andy's office. He is nursing a terrible hangover. As the staff starts filtering into his office, he thanks the guys for talking Mama out of changing the format and Johnny gives all the credit to Mr. Carlson. He has spun the story that she has decided to believe in her son's decision making and faith in the format. But then Andy started to wonder why everyone is coming into his office. 

It's a party for Andy! He missed the first one and everyone wants to congratulate Andy for turning the station around and making everything great at WKRP! Even Herb is thrilled to present Andy with a congratulatory cake. But he trips on Les' tape recorder and throws the cake, covering Andy! As the credits role, each staff member trickles out of the office, including a hung over Venus who crawls away. Finally like a naughty boy, Johnny scoops a handful of cake off and skips away as Andy sits alone and stunned, covered in his own cake. This is the life that one day before Andy had fought so hard to keep.

I think it's wonderful that, after everything we've watched, "WKRP in Cincinnati" end with a classic,old fashioned, lowbrow cake-in-the-face gag!

Roy

Other notes: Charles von Sanker was played by Nicholas Hormann. He is mostly a theatre actor with over 75 credits on IMDB, mostly in TV guest spots. Sadler, Selman and Cardone is a made-up radio consulting firm. This is George Gaynes' ONLY directing credit. You would recognize his from "Police Academy," "Punky Brewster" even a guest shot on the "Jennifer Home for Christmas" episode of WKRP. But his closest connection to the show is he was the real-life husband of Carmen Carlson, Allyn Ann McLerie!

I want to thank everyone who took some time to read any or all of the blog posts. I have made nothing from it but friends, so I feel very rich indeed. Thank you all! May the good news be yours.